The sting operation

There was a guy in school named Subroto Giri, who, we all agreed, was the world's most accident prone person. All the world's ill luck would strike him first before affecting others. We sympathized with him, though we couldn't help occasionally taking a dig at the poor guy.

I guess Murphy's law of averages has finally caught up with me. It's now my turn to be the butt of the jokes of my acquaintances. I went to HDFC Bank to sort 2 issues. One was sorted, the other had to wait. It was during my trudge back to my office that I made the mistake of putting my left hand into a hip pocket. Unknown to me, a bee had conveniently lodged itself there. No sooner had I made the intrusion than the bee stung me! My thumb, to be more precise. It felt like my thumb had been amputated. I did the obvious and withdrew my hand with a jerk, not knowing what had hit me. Getting a semblance of what had just happened, I realized to my consternation that the sucker could still be 'in' there. I feared getting stung again, this time into regions of my body far too vital.

Not knowing what to do, I came up with a plan to defeat the little creature. The modus operandi was simple. I would have to reach my office, take to the toilet, strip below the waist, turn my trousers inside out, attack the said pocket with all my might...and hope the bee wouldn't sting me in the interim period. The plan was executed to perfection, although attacking the pocket required artistry far more complex than I had originally imagined.

By the way, my efforts proved futile. After mercilessly pounding the pocket from all directions, I finally mustered enough courage to probe the pocket. I did a thorough check, but nothing was found. Obviously, the bee had escaped after the sting!


Vivek said…
A bee can sting only once. It dies after having done that.
deepanjan said…
Wikipedia quoted:
In honeybees, the worker bees have a modified ovipositor called a stinger with which they can sting to defend the hive. Contrary to popular belief, the bee will not always die soon after stinging: this is a misconception based on the fact that a bee will always die shortly after stinging a mammal; however, the stinger evolved primarily for inter-bee combat.
Other types of bees definitely do not die after stinging.
sittu said…
Vivek, tell that to the bee that stung me twice in Gurgaon just before I moved to Bangalore. I had just switched off the light after watch half a dozen episodes of Friends when I was stung in a toe. In a reflex I touched there and got stung in my finger also. For the next 12 hours, my brain was confused as to which one of them was causing more pain.
Sameer said…
Shakespeare has quoted this: - "To be or not to be, a bee"
Sameer said…
Sorry for the grammatical error. To quote this from Shakespeare's Hamlet,"To be or not to be, a bee: that is the question."
sittu said…
See, I told u, this guy is still alive.
Sebastian said…
I pity the guys outside who had to bare with all the sounds emiiting from the loo while you were atacking your pocket stipped below your waste.

You could have recorded it on your mobile we could have had a Blr Accenture MMS scandle
Sameer said…
I have heard my granny say this many times that after you have committed a hundred sins, you get bitten by a bee and after a thousand, you get bitten by a scorpion. **

** Information gathered from Grannypedia, the household encyclopedia about everything under the sky and also everything above it.
sittu said…
Its a religious practice in the Kayasth(or Lala, as u may better know) community to perform Chitragupt Puja every year two days after Diwali. It is believed that this absolves you of all ur sins.
Well, looks like between last year's puja and the time I was twice bitten by that Bee, I had committed only 200 sins :)

P.S. Due to some moving problems from Gurgaon to Kolkata, Chitragupta Puja was not performed this year @ my home. This means that all my last year's sins will accumulate till next year.
Sebastian said…
Saw your foto on flickr. I must say you proved everyone wrong; you have put on weight or was it the bee
deepanjan said…
Well, I gained weight all right! I wish I could go back to my lean and mean self.
deepanjan said…
Well, I'm hardly acquainted with the plethora of pujas performed. I've been an atheist and my parents never forced their will or beliefs on me. That's how I got to be an iconoclast in the first place.
Sameer said…
There are 7 deadly sins that the bible states. Committing these transgressions could expedite you being stung by a bee. These are: -

1) Anger

2) Envy

3) Greed

4) Pride - Gas-bag Deep has to be careful with this one.

5) Sloth - Deep, wash your chlothes in time.

6) Lust - Sittu...... Need I say more?

7) Gluttony - Oops!! This one is sin too??

I hope to meet you all the next time sans the bee stings. Also, the next time, before you put your hand in your pocket, ask someone else to probe it for you.
deepanjan said…
I've heard a wise guy say that after you have committed a million sins, you get pestered by a fool whose stupidity is unparalleled.
That explains Sameera's existence.
deepanjan said…
About the Acc B'lore scandal, well, catching a snapshot of my plight did cross my mind. But my site is pretty well known here and I'm sure I would get the sack if I so dared!
Sebastian said…
imagine someone probing dipsi's pocket hahahahaha
deepanjan said…
The sting would be fun, hah?
Vivek said…
Pocket Billiards, anyone?

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