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Showing posts from 2003

Swansong

1. My avant-garde views will fry tempers and crush egos of people with archaic mindsets if I continue with my overt postings.
2. I've made no bones about my real identity, thus necessitating mild self-censorship, something that has ruined the efficacy of my entries.
3. Living under the constant glare of public scrutiny is not particularly entertaining. It's like bathing is a transparent bathroom!
4. My write-ups tend to be a wee bit sardonic. It could breed bad blood amongst my acquaintances.

Consequently, future postings will be made anonymously in a new blog.
I may use my discretion in the distant future to transfer some of the more innocuous posts into these pages.

Adios!
Leonids scheduled for 14-21.
Hoping to catch a glimpse.
The impending semester-end exam has caught me with my pants down.
Fear Not! Procrastination is my forte.
The bad thing about good things is that they are so transient. They leave behind in their wake fond memories that painfully linger.
How helpless we are before the tyranny of time!

Chronicled

My table-clock exists in a sexist regime. As soon as its batteries begin to run out, its normally feminine-voiced hourly chime changes into an intimidating baritone!

A most heinous crime!

I've stooped to the level of the masses & bought the November issue of Filmfare, a magazine most apt for the zillion empty cans who populate our country. Actually, the hidden agenda was to procure the text-marker that was bundled free with the copy. I guess that extenuates my case a bit, though I'm still guilty of patronizing tabloid stuff!
Called up Kaushik. He's going great guns.
I've just witnessed the pernicious effects of overanalysis. It gave me the jitters!
I've been duped. A reprisal is in the offing.
Diwali was all set to begin with a bang, until the rain gods conspired to open the floodgates. The festival of lights lay paralyzed, held hostage by an ominous twist of fate.
However, our irrepressible spirits ultimately triumphed over the celestial designs & a spectacular show of lights, sounds and sparkles was gradually unveiled in all its splendour.
Muffled though the celebrations may have been, we had a whale of a time.
Blogging is bogging and bugging me. This novelty is a sheer waste of time, money and energy.
I was born great. The world cruelly tricked me and here I am, living thru the humiliation of mediocrity. What contempt of my genius!

Calcutta Chromosomes

I'm back in the spartan environs of the City of the Demented (Ranchi) after spending my fortnight-long vacation in the City of Joy (Kolkata). My holidays remained mostly uneventful & I got sucked into the myriad plots of the boob tube, stumbling across a great movie called Zelly & Me. Durga Puja faded into the backdrop. It rained cats and dogs for 3 days continually after Dashami.
Didi & family return after their tour of Darjeeling and its surroundings.
They buy a Sony Wega TV.

Freshers' Party-a siesta fiesta

Hitler's gas chambers must have been more entertaining. I arrived late owing to academic obligations, and thank my stars for not making me endure the entire ordeal of the chaotic party. Lunch was stretched beyond its permissible hours to oblige people like me & I had to make do with the leftovers. It took me some time to realize that the dance arena had been converted into the makeshift dining space & it was this treasured area that I was inadvertently hogging. The organizers were itching to get on with the cultural events & I didn't have the cheek to hold everybody to ransom just to satiate my enormous appetite. The buffet system failed to impress and I was left without a second helping. Hurrying thru my paces, I quickly emptied my plate and vacated the spot. My spurned affair with the culinary delights left me more famished than filled.
Meanwhile, Siddharth decided to play second fiddle and assumed a low profile running errands. This was in stark contrast with th…
I strongly espouse voluntary enthanasia. Why an overwhelming majority of nations are up in arms against it is simply beyond me.

Blood Donation

Mosquitoes in Ranchi are in a class of their own. They could suck an elephant dry in 30 seconds flat. The female mosquitoes need our protein rich blood to lay their eggs. Some abstinance on their part would make the world a better place to live for the human race.
Come evening and a band of jihadi mosquitoes gather in full force in my room. Their belligerence could instil fear into the bravest of hearts. Santosh (my rhinoceros-skinned roommate), the country bumpkin that he is, is seemingly immune to their attacks and remains aloof in his own world. He is the quintessential simpleton and has been the butt of many of my condescending jokes. His phlegmatism even in the face of their (mosquitoes) sustained attacks is phenomenal. The stoic disposition that he assumes could have moved even the Mahatma to tears!
Meanwhile, I am left alone in my misery, bracing up for their attacks. The battlelines drawn and the war canon sounded, what ensues is a fierce exchange of swats and bites between th…
Conjunctivitis is in the air. Inspite of Amit's malicious intentions, I have been spared from the ignominy.
Durga Puja is just round the corner and I have already donned the festive air, using it as a pretext for temporal renunciation from academia.
My interest in computer science is on the wane. I should have taken up astrophysics or ballet classes.

Exemplary Narcissism

Santosh's romantic affair with his own face is a great source of amusement for me. He grooms his hair with a clinical precision that could put brain surgeons to shame! He orients himself in every possible way and looks at the mirror to make sure that everything is in place and moves on to other chores only when he deems himself fit to appear before the Queen of England.
These physical self-assessments happen throughout the day and I take the liberty of entertaining myself with the spectacle!
Such recreational interludes are definitely more fun than watching grass grow!

Tako

I miss Tako. I fondly recall how I pestered my canine buddy whenever I caught him sunbathing on a heap of felled, dried leaves. I wish he could be here.
At least 2 of my friends have been bit by the blogging bug, thanks to me! I just hope they don't run out of steam too soon.
A few days ago, Mars got up close and personal with Earth. I learn that such rendezvous happen only once every 60,000 years.
Wow! I wouldn't miss such a date for the whole world!

Shikha

Why the hell didn't Shikha reply to any of my mails? Well, I would have loved to make friends with her. Anyway, I take heart in the fact that at least I tried to break the ice! This also proves that she is choosy in picking friends. Good for her!
Still, not being acquainted to someone so stunningly beautiful and intelligent, hurts.
Search Engines turn me on! Though Google is easily the best bet, I am emotionally skewed in favour of Alltheweb. The fierce rivalry between them has got the entire industry up & watching.
Good luck to both of them!
What a load of crap this blog is turning out to be! Life has degenerated to such an abominable level that I have nothing interesting to post. Even trees have a more active lifestyle!
Here's a wild prediction.
Piggybacked on nanotechnology, cryonics will be successful.
I had posted the following hoax mail to the mailing list of my school batchmates.

Yo Imbeciles!
With everyone jumping into the matrimonial bandwagon, why should I be left behind?
I recently got married clandestinely in a secluded temple in Varanasi, as parental consent was not forthcoming because of out diverse pedigrees. I hope you folks will forgive me for not extendind a formal invitation. I am attaching a photo of my wife.

Luv,
Deepanjan


Needless to say, most of my friends took the bait!
Of course, I had to let them off the hook. The attached photo of Pamela Anderson did just that!
22nd
Gopal pishai loses the battle of life to cancer. I feel sorry for Mampu.
15th
Bought the Indian tricolour after many years!
12th
I got didi's rakhi and letter. Dad's high BP got me worried and only a phone call could pacify me.
Life sucks! I've lost my afflatus in this abysmal city. I need something to pep me up.
Music is the aural transcription of nature. As I listen to Beethoven, my mind is hurled through space & time. I float through tranquil oceans and pastoral landscapes. Mozart encapsulates life in its entirety. Tchaikovsky reminds me of the sweet moments I had spent with my love. Debussy helps me rediscover solitude and embellishes my mind with benign thoughts.
Indeed, music is one of nature's most creative forces. Mathematicians have discovered some intriguing facets about it. I had read somewhere that there is an uncanny correlation between the notes that a pianist may play on his keyboard and the corresponding logarithms of their frequencies! Of course, this happens only when melody and not dissonance is created.
Here's yet another interpretation.
Whenever our brain interprets an audio frequency, it immediately expects a follow-up by one of certain frequencies. Once this expectation is met, it once again expects another frequency. This is an iterative process, giving rise…
Could things be more dismal? I used to be lean and mean in Pune. In Ranchi, I've put on weight, and have been bamboozled on a few occasions.
Pretty babes frequented every part of the city (Pune). I even enjoyed the camaraderie of many of them. In Ranchi, the girls are ultra-ugly. They have diminished my interests in the opposite sex to sub-zero levels!
Things change...only for the worse.
Surely, the Carpe Diem philosophy of Horace is the only way of living a happy and meaningful life.
Religion is one of man's most insidious inventions.It comes up with a ready set of postulates that we are all supposed to blindly follow. Religion paralyzes some of our most important attributes: thinking independently, questioning and inferring logically. How can the modern man remain so mum about this fallacious institution? For once, let us be iconoclasts. Let faith be the exclusive domain of every man who invents it. Let is be personalized and customized by our concience.
I'll recall an incident that happened a long time ago, when I was just a kid. There is nothing special about the incident; yet, it has left an indelible imprint on my mind.
It was an evening just like any other, except that the monsoon clouds were gathering in full force and threatening to spoil it, which I intended to spend with my playmates. The prospects to that effect looked rather grim as the clouds enveloped the entire skyin an infinite canopy of myriad gray shades. Occasionally, the golden sunrays would manage to puncture through the thick covering and travel hurriedly over the landscape before being shrouded.
As the clouds descended upon us and threatened to condemn us to eternal darkness, I gave up all hopes of playing with my friends. Instead, I invented imaginary creatures with the morphing clouds and contrived stories of war waging between them.
My mother and sister had gone out and I was alone with my dad, who had apparently resigned to fate, as there seemed little prosp…
Robert and his band of mentally warped nutheads have cast their sinister sights on my beloved blog. The following posting is directed exclusively @ them:

If you see me coming, better step aside;
A lot of men didn't, a lot of men died.
The following is an autoresponder I had composed a long time back. I received some funny replies!

Deepanjan is my name
Widespread is my fame

Dear biodegradable creature,
How dare you have the cheek to send me a mail!Have you even
the ghost of an idea how hideous is your crime?Hoping(but not expecting),that
your offence was committed under a spell of evanescent irrationality, you are
hereby permitted to continue feasting your eyes on this epistolary masterpiece.
You must obviously be aware that I belong to a higher sphere,and consequently dislike interacting with mere mortals like you. However,since I have been endowed with great magnanimity,I'll definitely condescend you by reading your frivolous mail within a month. However,a response will be sent only if you are worth your existance.
Since a personal reply is indicative of your worthiness,please feel free to consider yourself worthless and useless if you do not receive it withi…
I am viewing the new Blogger look for the very first time. Prima facie, it doesn't look impressive!
We had our viva today.Summoned @ 9AM, we were finally grilled @ 4PM! It proved to be an anticlimax as the questions were too easy.
Apparently, I was a bit vociferous!

Classes ended today and our end semester exam is scheduled to begin on the 7th and end on the 16th of May, interspersed with a lot of off-days.

SAD quiz was held yesterday, and I dabbled with the idea of appearing for it, finally settling against it. I was immediately hit by a feeling of guilt and I somehow extenuated it with some valid reasons.
MIssed classes today. Ranchi has become unbarably hot.
Called on mom and Shrirang bhaiya, yesterday. It was nice to learn that Buada has got a promotion. Uncle and Aunty were having diner and so couldn't converse with me.
WE had our BDP lab quiz today. Another mundane day.
Classes are becoming bohemian as the semester-end nears. This was our penultimate week of classes. I plan to bunk most, if not all the classes next week.
Dabbled with Blogger and Livejournal for a long time! Just can't get the hang of HTML by simply playing the fool.
Yestarday was Ramnavomi. Another exhibition of our antiquated beliefs and customs. Will our nation ever see the light of civilization? I doubt!
I was not impressed with what Livejournal had to offer. It failed to live up to the hype Digit has created. Anyway, it is a nice site. No match for blagger, though!
Perhaps that's why Google chose Blogger!
I have to see the features of Livejournal to give a final verdict, though!
One of my glasses is missing! I came to know of this anomaly only this morning. My glasses were out of focus and my frame was old too, so I would have to change them anyway!
Kaushik has bought a car! His meteoric rise from the depths of despair is the stuff ludicrous Bollywood scripts are made of.
As an Indian, I have had a chronic admiration for America. Liberty, Equality and Fraternity are its hallmarks, Humanity its religion and Altruism its doctrine. To me, USA has been a manifestation of near-perfection.
Yet today, it is engripped by a neo-Hitlerism promulgated by a man who is at its helm. So vain is he that he cannot see how deleterious his present exploits will be on generations of Americans. So stupid is he that nothing can bring him back to his senses, not even protests from all over the world. So intoxicated is he that he can't see how miserable a condition the innocent people of Iraq are living thru. So contemptuous is he that he cannot hear the will of the rest od the world voiced thru the UN. So pathetic is he that he can't even realise how incredible his make-believe speeches on Iraqi weapons of mass destruction sound, when the UN inspectors unearth ample facts that prove the contrary.
The US and its little sycophant(UK) seem to subscribe to an a…
Santosh morphs into a nocturnal beast whenever an exam is impending.
Expenditure in March:1873
The connection is terrible today!
We lost World Cup 2003 yesterday. Our spirits sagged, there was gloom all around and we were emotionally wrecked. The hammering that we got at the hands of the Austrailans annihilated our egos. All-in-all, a terrible day for Indian cricket lovers. Rain intervened and there was a glimmer of hope, but a dazzling Sun soon dragged us back to our miseries!